I’ve come to the conclusion that there exists somewhere out in the ether, a document outlining some time-tested ways to annoy a Mac user. I think this document gets quietly installed along with every copy of Windows on every PC in the world and I think many of my friends and co-workers have secretly used it just to drive me crazy. Based on my experiences, here’s just a bit of what I’m sure is a much longer list….
WAYS TO ANNOY A MAC USER. Memorize and destroy. Deny everything. TOP SECRET.
1) Tell the Mac user that OS X looks nice, but that you simply can’t give up your 2 button mouse.
2) Make fun of the mac startup chime with repeated BoNg! noises.
3) When the Mac user sends you email with an in-line attachment, be sure to tell them the attachment is missing.
4) When naming files for a Mac user, do not use english. Make them look like passwords. “Wk24Skd01.xls”
5) Call the OS X dock the “start bar” and widgets “gadgets”. Double points if you get to say, “hey! isn’t that the duck icon from Windows XP?”
6) Periodically send the Mac user an email with an attachment called “winmail.dat”
7) Be sure to ask “why are you dragging your disk/cd/flash drive to the recycle bin?”
8) Refer to firewire as IEEE1394. Added points if you claim it was invented by Sony.
9) Save every document in .docx format.
10) Never use QuickTime. Encode all your video as a generic AVI using a random selection of codecs.
11) Ask the mac user if they’ve tried Google’s Chrome web browser yet.
12) Mention Microsoft exchange.
if all else fails, repeat the following, but use at your own risk….
You spent HOW MUCH for your MAC?
I only paid (insert absurdly low dollar amount) for my (insert vendor and model here) and it came with a printer and a digital camera!
So, my question for Friday is this….what else goes on the list?